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Published on 01/21/2025
Sexual harassment and sexual assault are distressing events, and proper training in these areas is crucial. This is especially true for security personnel in bars or clubs, where the need for appropriate training is absolutely vital. The following is a real-life incident that underscores the importance of such training.
I recently received a call from a client regarding an injury sustained by one of their security guards while escorting a combative female guest. As the owner recounted the incident, I attentively listened and conducted a mental analysis of the situation, a routine practice for me when hearing such stories.
While the owner narrated the incident, I assessed the root cause and contemplated potential solutions to aid my other clients in preventing similar injuries. Moreover, I recognized that the story highlighted a growing issue observed nationwide in bars and clubs—namely, an escalation in violent behavior among females, causing apprehension among male security guards to intervene physically.
It's worth noting that the injury in question is commonly referred to as a "Fish hook." For those unfamiliar, this painful and potentially life-changing injury occurs when a female guest, holding her stiletto heels, uses them as a weapon by swinging them at a security guard. The "Fish hook" transpires when the elongated, slender part of the heel catches the guard in the soft tissue of the cheek and penetrates into the mouth, hence the name "Fish hook" injury.
In this specific incident, and unfortunately, in numerous similar cases, the underlying reason for the situation can be traced back to two key factors. Firstly, the individual was allowed to become excessively intoxicated while at the club. The second aspect contributing to the incident was the genuine fear exhibited by the three security guards involved in physically managing her removal.
Yes, you read that correctly—the security guards were hesitant to physically intervene with a violent female guest. For those within the hospitality industry, this might not be a surprise, but for those unfamiliar with the complexities of this situation, let me shed some light on this multifaceted issue.
The guards faced a dual concern when contemplating physical intervention with the violent female. First, there was a fear of being accused of sexual harassment, and second, there was a fear of being accused of sexual assault. However, it's important to clarify that neither accusation genuinely applies to bar or club security guards when executing their duties correctly.
To delve deeper into this issue, I'll provide a detailed explanation. As you read through this, I encourage you to keep an open mind and carefully consider the nuances of the situation. I must emphasize that I am not an attorney, and if you have reservations about my explanation, it is advisable to seek legal counsel to confirm its accuracy. Here, I'll outline the primary historical reasons why male guards have been apprehensive about physically restraining and handling a violent female.
The primary "why" in this scenario reveals two layers of concern for male security guards: fear of being accused of sexual harassment and sexual assault. This fear stems from ingrained gender bias, societal stereotypes, and inadequate training. Understanding these underlying issues is crucial to addressing the multilevel problem faced by security personnel.
Many male security guards were once young boys and adolescents, learning basic principles ingrained by societal norms. While it's essential to note that not all males received such guidance, it has been a prevalent part of upbringing for many. These gender biases are not personal beliefs but reflections of societal teachings over the years. Personally, my father imparted these lessons to me, and I, in turn, passed them on to my son. Here's a breakdown:
1. Boys should treat girls with kindness.
2. Boys are discouraged from hitting girls.
3. Traditional "boy toys" include guns, sports equipment, trucks, and cars.
4. Traditional "girl toys" encompass dolls, rainbow coloring books, and dress-up clothes.
5. Young men are taught to hold doors open, open car doors, and let females go first.
6. Boys are often encouraged to be tough, resilient, and avoid showing vulnerability. If a boy falls, the response is typically, "get up, don't cry, you're not really hurt."
7. Girls are often depicted as soft and tender, and if they trip and fall, the response might be, "oh, baby, my princess, let me see that boo-boo, let daddy kiss it and make it better," as tears are gently wiped away.
8. Boys are advised not to cry and to embody toughness, with statements like "don't be a girl."
9. Girls, on the other hand, are told it's acceptable to cry, be emotional, and embrace tenderness.
10. Men are viewed as providers and protectors.
11. Women are seen as caregivers, responsible for the home, family, and supporting their man.
12. Females are often perceived as needing defense by men.
13. The notion that females don't engage in physical fights is prevalent.
These represent only a fraction of the prevalent gender bias stereotypes, with many others existing. While acknowledging that there are resilient and independent women taught toughness by both male and female role models, this outline aligns with nearly 90% of the male population.
In addition to these gender stereotypes, boys and young men are commonly instructed with phrases like "Don't raise your voice to your mother," "You don't hit your sister," and "Boys don't hit girls." While not inherently negative guidance, the lasting impact of these messages is noteworthy.
Considering the training and education received by younger males from their older male role models, it becomes apparent why male guards might harbor apprehensions when dealing with a combative female. Firstly, the uncommon sight of a female engaging in physical conflict can catch men off guard. Secondly, the prospect of physically restraining a fighting female contradicts ingrained lessons from their formative years. This background understanding is crucial for comprehending the apprehension experienced by male security guards in such situations.
Promoting a comfortable and successful work environment involves prioritizing training on Sexual Harassment and Sexual Assault prevention. I am a staunch advocate for this crucial training and believe it deserves increased emphasis. However, the hospitality industry presents unique challenges in teaching these topics to our employees, particularly male staff members.
While the majority of Sexual Harassment and Sexual Assault training sessions in the hospitality industry focus on addressing inappropriate behavior among employees, there is a crucial aspect often overlooked. What's missing is a discussion on what Sexual Harassment and Sexual Assault are NOT. Shedding light on what these terms do not encompass can significantly contribute to the understanding of the issue, potentially reducing incidents of assault on guards by females, diminishing premise liability, and lowering negligence claims.
It's essential to clarify that my training and insights revolve around a straightforward principle: a guest is not an employee, and the conventional terms of Sexual Harassment and Sexual Assault do not apply when it comes to male employees interacting with guests. The implications of this should be relatively straightforward to grasp.
Adhering to specific laws governing employee conduct is crucial in the workplace, distinguishing between appropriate and inappropriate behavior. However, these laws do not extend in the same manner to guests in bars or clubs. Here are a few illustrative scenarios to elucidate these distinctions:
Example: A guard makes a crude remark about a guest's physical appearance, which, while inappropriate, doesn't qualify as illegal Sexual Harassment.
Consequence: The guard should face termination for their inappropriate behavior.
Example: A guard persistently asks a guest for their phone number and attempts to secure a date, exhibiting unwelcome and possibly intimidating behavior.
Consequence: Although not legally classified as Sexual Harassment, the guard should be terminated for their inappropriate actions.
Example: A female guest engages in a physical altercation, prompting a security guard to intervene by holding her arms behind her back and calming her down.
Clarification: Despite the physical contact, this action does not constitute workplace harassment, as the guard is performing their duty to prevent further harm.
Moving beyond harassment, let's discuss Sexual Assault, a "Specific Intent Crime." This term implies that the suspect must harbor a particular intent before or during the commission of the crime. Essential actions, such as intentional touching of intimate parts with the aim of causing sexual arousal, must also be present.
Applying this understanding to our previous scenario of a guard intervening in a fight, it's evident that the guard's intent was solely to prevent harm, not to engage in Sexual Assault.
Security guards play a crucial role in maintaining safety, and training is pivotal for navigating complex situations. Female empowerment has led to an increase in physical altercations, necessitating comprehensive training for guards to handle these situations effectively.
Returning to the initial client call, it becomes apparent that if the security guards had correctly intervened by securing the combative female guest's hands, the injury could likely have been prevented.
Despite resistance to change due to deep-rooted gender bias training, it's imperative for operators, managers, and guards to prioritize proper training. Two key training goals are preventing guard arrests and minimizing the risk of lawsuits for the establishment.
While concerns about potential complaints from involved parties may arise, the cost of not promptly and correctly addressing a situation can far outweigh the risks associated with potential complaints. Owners and managers should emphasize that preventing injuries to guests, employees, and guards is a primary responsibility, and understanding the nuances of Sexual Harassment and Sexual Assault is instrumental in achieving this goal.
In a landscape dominated by evolving societal norms, the training of security personnel must adapt to address the reality of rising female violence. By dispelling misconceptions and offering comprehensive training, the hospitality industry can ensure the safety of guests, employees, and security guards, fostering an environment that prevents injuries and minimizes liability. Be sure to listen our Podcast on alcohol and bar related sexual assault.
While the author is not a legal professional, the insights provided are based on extensive experience in the industry. Consultation with legal professionals is recommended for specific legal advice.
If you or anyone you know has been a victim of sexual assault please use the resources below to report a sexual assault crime:
National Sexual Assault Hotline
